Alex Abundis reviews Bullets of Justice starring Danny Trejo!!
You’ll Squeal for Bullets for Justice
By Alex Abundis
When I read the synopsis for the film Bullets for Justice I was a tad skeptical of what I was getting myself into, but I thought “Well, if Danny Trejo is in it, it must be at least halfway decent.” Then, I started the film and got on 79 minute train ride filled with action, suspense, sex, pig people, and I just didn’t want to get off! The film follows our hero Rob Justice (Timur Turisbekov) as he and his mustached sister/lover, Raksha (Doroteya Toleva) navigate through a post-apocalyptic world where human-pig hybrids known as “muzzles” dominate. Muzzles came about during WWIII when America and Russia decided to outdo each other by employing scientists to build on the Nazi’s idea of the “super human.” After realizing they created a new enemy in the form of a super strong half man/half pig creature with a taste for human flesh, the two countries reconciled and decided to exterminate the muzzles by unleashing a chemical among the world, but like most brilliant plans by a nation’s armed forces it back fired- sterilizing all organisms on the planet. Only the Mother, a giant muzzle with an insatiable hunger for human meat, has the ability to continue to give birth to the new race of creatures that control the planet. It is now up to Rob and Rakesha, along with the guiding voice of their deceased caretaker (Danny Trejo) to defeat the Mother and wipe out the muzzles once and for all.
Let me preface this by saying this is in no way a master piece of cinema that should be taken seriously. Bullets for Justice is a film for horror and sci-fi fans that love the grittiness, the crudeness, and the outrageousness that can really only come from an independent film. That being said, writer and director Valeri Milev hold nothing back in this Kazakh fantasy where nothing is off limits. He immediately opens the film with intense action scenes, choreographed fight scenes, and (quite obviously fake) explosions and property damage. At first, you assume the film will focus all it’s efforts on telling a solid serious story, but by the time we get to our first awkward sex scene (and an incredibly long full frontal shot) we realize it is anything but. The audience gets bombarded with characters like Raksha– a woman who, for no apparent reason has a mustache, Benedict Asshole– a traitorous muzzle with an appropriately shaped head, and Rafael- a duel sword wielding villain who flips around in nothing more than a sock and leather fringe. If you’re not sold on these characters, then I should also point out the film does a fantastic job in investing in their make-up and special effects team. It’s not often that you see someone stick a gun up dead man’s butt and shoot a pig man through the corpse’s ween (is that where the phrase blowing a load comes from???)
With all it’s ridiculousness Bullets for Justice does check all the boxes of a top notch B Film. It gives audiences a hero on a quest, and equips him with time travel, high caliber weapons, and all the other components of a sci-fi epic. In addition to that, the film also provides an undertow of social commentary. Rob struggles with his fantasies of his enemy Rafael, and his “perfect ass.” Even though he sleeps with women, Rob is obviously dealing with an identity crisis that may be relatable to LGBT viewers. His masculinity is challenged, but never wavers, even in the climactic “dance” with Rafael. Also, the fact that the humans now become the farm animals is also quite unnerving. You see them kept in extremely cramped, soiled cages, and fattened up to the point of morbid obesity. At first you’re disgusted, but then you realize this is the same thing we do to pigs (and chickens, and cows…) now! I’m no vegan, but this film definitely made me question some of my life choices.
All in all, this film should not be slept on. It is a sterling examples of the power independent filmmakers have when it comes to telling a story. I can almost guarantee, that if Valeri and Timur took this film to an American studio they would probably be laughed at if it even got that far. As farfetched and ridiculous as this story is, it demonstrates the tenacity of the filmmaker. Without the work of the cast and crew, audiences may have never got a chance to get on the 79 minute train ride, or meet Rakesha (I really do want to know why she had a mustache!). If you’re a film snob I would definitely recommend you pass, but if you’re like me, a genre loving, open minded, free soul who sees the best in everything, then Bullets For Justice is the post-apocalyptic, gay peppered , horror comedy you didn’t know you needed. Plus it’s got MACHETE himself!
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